Hey there everybody Bones here. I can't help but notice the absolute wave of NUCLEAR WAR hysteria plaguing all of the Social Medias right now! I can't help but notice because I've been eating it up just like everybody else.
But then it came to me.. There are a number of ways to die that are infinitely more likely and entertainingly terrifying. For instance we have the Gay Bomb.
I first heard about the Gay Bomb when good ol George Dubya in office and was slanging his brand of New World Order Dick. Apparently these crafty scientist bastards have figured out a way to put a specific amount of pheremone into a bomb and then blow that shit up right over our heads. (Hopefully we won't be in the same area when that goes off am I right?) More about the Gay Bomb Here and Here and Here.
Thats enough of that. Lets move on to the next possibility. The Rod of God!
Seriously? I have always known that there were people paid to come up with ways of killing humanity but whats up with all the sexual depravity that comes along with it?
The Rod of God was a name given to a Kinetic Kill Weapon that basically just uses mass plus gravity and GPS to make it look like a funky accident. The theory behind this weapon is sound. They suspend Tungsten rods onto a GPS satelite, pick a location and drop said rod into the atmosphere and let gravity do the rest. The result is destruction meant to mimic a Nuclear Weapon with absolutly no residule radiation. BRILLIANT! And apparently this might have been used by the United States government against China in retaliation to Chinese hackers causing a multi hour crash of our stock market a few years back. Here you can see a video of China having an accident after playing with our money.
So am I worried about Lil Kim launching a nuclear missle within range of my house? The answer is NO. Am I riddled with worry over the weapons that they don't drone on about over and over in the media? Am I worried about about a rogue government agent launching a Gay Bomb over El Owl Studios while Bones and Tubs is recording, and Gaying each other to death? The answer is YES.
Stay Woke Bones and Tubs Nation, Stay Woke!